They're Sames!

After the blogmania blogfest of a couple of weeks ago, I’ve completely forgotten to update since seeing the surgeon last week. Useless. I understand if you want to see other blogs.

If you’re willing to give me another chance, read on.

Good news, everyone (said in a Farnsworth-esque voice): my legs are apparently the same length after all! After spending four weeks thinking one leg was more than an inch longer than the other, buying new shoes and getting them altered... the surgeon has changed his mind and seems to think that my pelvis is lifted on one side, making that leg sit higher and so seem shorter. This has most likely come about from walking with a crutch for so long and altering the way I move to avoid pain, and should settle back down of its own accord as my body recovers and sorts itself back into place.

This is AWESOME. But I’m being a bit reserved in my joy; I don’t want to get my hopes up too far only to have them change their minds again!

Is anybody in the market for a pair of shoes with one sole 2cm bigger than the other? Hit me up. I have some I’m not using.

Off to Australia really soon – next week or the week after (it’s still being confirmed). Going to Melbourne to catch up with and hang out with the big brother and his Mrs before heading to Sydney to stay with my sister and her husband, and meet my new niece. As well as that I’m getting to catch up with Miss Blaise! I really really can’t wait, I’ve never been to either city and I miss my family like crazy. I wish I had more money to spend there, but unfortunately having surgery (and thus being unemployed) is not conducive to having a bunch of spare cash!

But when I get back in late November, I will begin the job hunt. I can’t do anything that requires me to be on my feet for long periods of time, or work in a call centre, so I’m pretty limited but I’m determined to find something!

Things that are rather passable: Mum being back from Sydney, NZ taking out the Rugby World Cup, being able to drive again, the book 'American Gods' by Neil Gaiman.

Things that are less than ideal: Paying for petrol again, my chronic back pain, WINZ appointments.

Delicious Consumable Happenings

I’ve decided that as boring as surgery recovery is, it could be much, much worse. How on earth people did it before computers is beyond me. My laptop has become my best friend.

On that note, here are some things I have been enjoying doing, online and otherwise.

Despite the seemingly endless supply of crap online, I have found these wee golden nuggets of internet joy:

Jason Good’s blog (http://jasongood.net/) thanks to my friend Blaise. He has a new post every day, most of which are quite hilarious.

Unfollowing Jesus (http://unfollowingjesus.com/) – not for the easily offended or those in the Christian way. Funny for the rest of us.

My sleeping has not been so good at doing its job, so I’ve been watching British television brilliance on YouTube well into the night. Lots of full episodes on there from my current favourites, Never Mind The Buzzcocks and QI. WATCH THEM. I will quietly confess to enjoying keeping up with new episodes of The Big Bang Theory online, too. Hey, sometimes you want to watch crap, and for crap it’s not too bad.

I’ve also been writing a few reviews. You can find my latest one here: http://libel.co.nz/3176-the_panics_rain_on_the_humming_wire#.Tpan6fkuAV4.twitter. If you go back a few reviews, you’ll find the Boy & Bear one I did, too!

Currently enjoying the musical stylings of Thrice (how did it take me so long to get round to listening to these guys?!) and Alkaline Trio. Both deliciously good alt rock.

I finished The Book Thief and it was AMAZING. Every single person ever should read it. Am now on to the book of The Help, a movie I saw a few weeks ago. I’ve also finally picked up Neil Gaimon’s American Gods. Looking forward to getting stuck into it.

I saw The Lion King in 3D at the movies!! It was my first ever movie at the movies, back in 1994 (in 2D – old school). I remember it mostly from the Lion King activity book I was bought from a gas station on the way home. 3D didn’t add much to the experience, but reliving my childhood was amazing. That movie will never get old.

My knitting now lives in a draw. I can’t keep it out or the kitten goes into attack mode (as Mum learned the hard way on several occasions!). The flip side of this is that I never see it and I forget about it so I don’t do it. Oops. Also, Mum being in Sydney means my attempts at reading the pattern have been somewhat fruitless without her guidance. I will get there though. I have a niece now, and I’d hate for her to grow out of it before it’s even done!

That is all. For now.

Jean Revisited

Given the enthusiastic feedback I got about my hospital room mate, I thought I’d share a bit more about her.

Jean, bless her soul, was 80 and in for her second hip replacement (non-cemented, which continues to confuse me). She talked incesantly; something made all the more fun by her lack of hearing skills leading to frequent miscommunication.

I don’t remember Jean’s daughters’ names, but for the sake of the story let’s call them Anna and Jane. One of the first things Jean told me was about was her doctor saying she must have a very good diet. “I’d best not tell Anna about that” she told me, laughing, “she’s vegetarian you see” in a way which suggested two things:

1 – Anna’s vegetarianism was a sensitive subject, but an amusing one.

2 – Anna couldn’t possibly have a good diet as a vegetarian, and would be upset that her meat-eater mother did.

She didn’t quite know what to say when I told her that I am vegetarian, too.

Later that afternoon she talked to her daughters on the phone. When she thought she was talking to her other daughter, Jane, she said the same as she’d said to me. Turns out she didn’t know who she was talking to, and had told her funny story about her good diet and not telling Anna, to Anna. Despite hearing it happen (being only about two metres away), she told me all about the confusion as soon as she was off the phone.

Jean was so good at talking that she really didn’t need a response. She was having a conversation with herself, and just directing it at me. One afternoon I didn’t reply for long enough to fall asleep, and when I did she was still going. When I woke up she appeared to have bored herself to sleep, too.

When my epidural wore off, I felt terrible. Overdramatic, “I-want-to-die” kind of terrible. Apparently it’s quite common for epidurals. But because Jean had also felt terrible, she subsequently refused to take any pain medication at all. Several people explained that it was the epidural, not the pain medication, that had made her feel like that – I tried to tell her that I’d had the same experience – but she wouldn’t have a bar of it.

Because of this, she was naturally in a lot of pain. You should have heard her complain about the orderlies “throwing [her] around”. She was angry because they didn’t explicitly ask her if she had been taking the morphine, despite the fact that every other sane patient does. I watched them be quite careful with her, so I must have missed the throwing bit. I thought that was quite a shame; my minimal sympathy a result of having to listen to her moan about her pain while refusing to do anything about it and not listening to the nurses about the epidural.

But the icing on the Jean cake came at about 2am one morning. Jean needed to go to the bathroom, and decided that 2am was the best time for her to get up for the first time since her surgery. She disagreed with the nurse, who told her just to use the pan because it was the middle of the night and that she would be getting up in the morning anyway. Now, I know from experience that it’s not easy – I cried from the pain the first time I got out of bed – which is why Jean was far from discreet about the ordeal. The whole thing took about half an hour, but the best bit was when she practically yelled “I HOPE I’M NOT WAKING GABRIELLE UP, I’D HATE TO DO THAT!” No Jean, your overwhelming subtlety could never wake me.

Jean was a constant source of both entertainment and irritation in hospital. I do hope she’s doing well though; she was certainly quite a character.

Update-O-Rama

With all that’s been going on, I’ve forgotten to write about how much better I’m getting. To be honest I’ve largely forgotten to notice how much better I’m getting.

I’m just using one crutch most of the time now, and even walking around home without anything at all! My leg length difference and remaining weakness in my operated leg mean my limp is pretty severe when I do so... but at least I can! Two crutches are still better when walking around a bit; I went to the mall yesterday and was wishing I had the other, but I managed. And I think the less I rely on them, the stronger I get.

I’ve had crutches and relied on them for over nine weeks now, so they’ve become my security and I get quite nervous about going places without both. But I am getting heaps stronger every day and I can manage most of the time, which is encouraging. I think my physio exercises and hydrotherapy sessions are really helping. I want to be good and strong when I see the surgeon next week so that he doesn’t say I still can’t drive!

I’ve even started having showers standing up! Well, I did it once last week and it was a bit tough... But I’ve done it for two days in a row this week now and been fine, so I’m going to try to keep it up.

It’s all a step (pun intended) in the right direction, anyway.

Small Stuff...

....like shoes and people.

Yes, my sister now has her very own small person (well, I think it’s co-owned by her and her husband, but I don’t want to be presumptuous about their arrangement). I’m an aunty! And you know what? It’s just really hard to be a grumpy shit when something so freakin amazing is going on. Seriously, Jess GREW A PERSON, and now my niece is here and she’s small and lovely and completely dependent on the big people around her... That’s actually so awesome to me that small issues like my legs seem insignificant.

I can’t wait to meet her!

In other bright side news, I have sent some shoes away to be appropriately altered. I kinda don’t know if this is good news or not, as it DOES mean one of my shoes will have a sole that’s 2cm chunkier than the other and I’ll feel like a bit of a spaztard... But I’m going to look at it as a good thing, cause it should mean I’ll walk all fancy – and by fancy I mean level and stuff, not screwing my back up. Ooohh.  I had to get some new shoes so that I had ones that would handle the extra weight, and that would last me a while, and I actually got kids shoes. Size 2. Yes, I am that ridiculously small. Go ahead – laugh. Even I’m laughing at myself on this one. Made them way cheaper though, so fuck it.

I have also been a bit proactive about enlisting help from people. I’ve put in an application with ACC to hopefully get them to fund some more shoes (ie buying new ones and getting them altered, cause the health board or hospital or whoever pays for these things will only fund the altering of two pairs a year, and no new ones). And I figure it like this: I need walking shoes, summer shoes, winter shoes, dressy shoes, work shoes – and that's just the basics. My doctor thinks I might not get it though, because apparently leg length discrepancies are a common complication of hip replacement surgery. Um, what?! It’s common and nobody bothered to mention it to me before the op? Thanks, team. I don’t think it’s actually common for the discrepancy to be as big as mine – a minimal difference wouldn’t even be noticeable so wouldn’t matter – but apparently the amount doesn’t actually matter as far as ACC are concerned. Bummer.

So I’ve got a meeting with WINZ on Thursday to see if they’ll help. AND I’ve been in touch with the Health and Disabilities Commissioner’s office to get some help and advice about the process ahead, and getting what I want and need out of it. I want to be fully informed and given options instead of just being told what to do, and I’m hoping they can help me.

Matthew yesterday on climbing into the back seat of a small car: “It’s like being born in reverse” - Yet another example of small stuff making for some great comic relief.

Things that are just really super: my sister being a mother! Seriously. I can’t get over it. I’m so happy for them.

Things that aren’t super: with new-found motherdom (and my auntydom) going on? Nothing!